Unconscious or subconscious? . . . or maybe it's just sleeping . . . Regardless, I'm a mother under all conditions.
Yesterday, I dropped my eldest at the airport for a flight to Europe where he and a friend will travel to several countries on their own with limited itinerary constraints and without any adult escorts. [I know, I know, technically they're adults but that's not the point; they're still young and in their teens, even if only for a few more months.] I did not park and escort him to the gate. I didn't text him at the airport. I asked only that he let us know when he's about to take off and when he lands. And then I went about my life, attending to his brothers.
At 3:30 am I bolted awake in bed. Unconsciously, subconsciously and half-asleep, I turned on the news and watched until after 4. Still talking about Bin Laden. Possible retaliations. But, no plane disasters. I breathed easy. And turned on repeats of RHoNYC. I then realized that my son's plane was scheduled to land at approximately 4 am our time. The maternal alarm had gone off without a premeditated setting.
